


Dangerous Liasons

by Bexinthecity247, TerryMcKay



Category: Bodyguard (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, Collaboration, F/M, Julia has a bit of a nervous breakdown, Romance, terrorist attack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-06
Updated: 2020-01-06
Packaged: 2021-02-27 03:53:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,823
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22150609
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bexinthecity247/pseuds/Bexinthecity247, https://archiveofourown.org/users/TerryMcKay/pseuds/TerryMcKay
Summary: David was not supposed to be at his child's school the morning a terrorist decided to attack.Julia goes through hell throughout the day.
Relationships: David Budd & Julia Montague, David Budd/Julia Montague
Comments: 10
Kudos: 129
Collections: LavenderBudd Fic Exchange





	Dangerous Liasons

**Author's Note:**

> This was a thank you from Lea (TerryMcKay) and I, for all the people who took part in the Lavender Budd fic exchange.
> 
> We had no drop outs and that is just fantastic. It was a lot of fun so who knows - there may be another one day!

“We have intelligence on a possible terrorist attack on a London school.”

It wasn’t even 9 am and Julia was already on edge. Her office adorned by all its glass walls had always been devoid of emotions. The meeting with Stephen Hunter-Dunn turned it even chillier if that was even possible. What had been a bearable working environment, now had the air of imminent danger, tension and oppression. Her plan on exposing Vosler, working in secret with Hunter-Dunn was something that could at best help her make a leap for no 10, but in the worst case, it could also end her political career. Yet her sense of justice forced her to act, even if the very idea of meeting with Stephen in a secret meeting sent goosebumps down her spine and gave her the urge to build up her walls even higher. 

The only way to defrost the atmosphere was to look at David. This morning, however, it was not him watching her, but Tom instead. He had been called in for a meeting with Craddock and was to relieve him later this morning. Being able to look into his ridiculously-blue eyes, feel his look piercing her and hear him call her “ma’am in his husky Scottish accent as she passed him in a corridor, whilst she fought the urge to drag him into the next toilet and ravish him, was the only flicker of hope on this snowy December morning. 

Their affair had been going on for far longer than it should have. Julia was well aware that exposing this particular secret might be much worse than her attempt to dethroning the PM. Much, much worse. She would be able to survive that, but would forever bear the stain of being a wanton and a homewrecker if it came to light that she had been having an affair with her married PPO for the better part of two months now. 

“Oh my God,” Julia mumbled, taken aback by the news Hunter-Dunn had just presented to her. Her mind, immediately focusing back on the task at hand, started reeling of possible ways how to deal with this situation. She looked up at the man sitting opposite her who continued without so much as looking up from his sheet. 

“The cell’s comms are encrypted but metadata suggests a pattern of reconnoitring schools.”

“Feed these through the police when they arrive,” Julia said matter of factly.

“Ordinarily I would, but one of the schools threw up a link to a serving police officer. His kids attend. David Budd.”

If she had been only listening half-heartedly, Stephen had her full attention now. Holding her breath for a moment, she kept her glance trained on the glass table between them, before she felt confident enough to look up again. 

Hunter-Dunn looked at her expectantly, obviously waiting for her orders. 

“Before we don’t know who is involved in this, we should try and keep this to ourselves. We’ll tighten security around the schools and hold back the reason why.”

Sounding like the ever professional politician, she gave him the answer he was satisfied with, thanked her and left, much to Julia’s relief. 

As she led him out of her office, she flicked a glance outside only to see that Tom was still on his post and David had not turned up yet. She did wonder what kind of a meeting it was and what was keeping him so long. 

She drummed her fingers against the desk, stomach knotting with the fluttering of butterflies. Where was he? She shouldn’t care this much, shouldn’t be thinking of him when- 

“Home secretary?” 

Her head whipped up to the doorway, hand brushing through her hair as Tahir stood awkwardly like a schoolboy waiting to talk to the headteacher. 

“What is it?” she said, a desperate edge to her voice that she was no fan of.

“Commander Sampson called,” he said and a heavy lead ball settled in her chest. She said nothing, simply tilted her head, urging him coldly to continue. “She wanted you to know that there is an ongoing situation at Heath Bank. She said it was probably terrorist-related and that she felt you ought to know.” 

His words dissolved into fog as she stared at his moving mouth, mind blurred as the reality of the unfolding situation threatened to explode catastrophically into her universe. She swiped up the television remote and flicked the flatscreen on at the other end of the office. BBC news, and the voice of Ben Brown burst into the room and it took several minutes for her to even register that Tahir was hovering awkwardly in the doorway, waiting for dismissal like she was some general.

“You can go now,” she said somewhat colder than she perhaps intended, only briefly tearing her eyes from the screen to look at him. He mumbled something of an apology and she heard him leave rather than saw.

“The unfolding situation here, Fiona, is that according to eye witness reports, a white box vehicle, carrying either two or three men drove directly towards the school gates before police officers intervened, firing several shots at the vehicle which then ploughed into the backend of the school where it exploded.” 

Julia ‘s breath hitched so hard, it hurt and her heart rate spiked. Fuck. She should have done something more. What if… She swallowed, mouth drier than the Sahara as the report broke away to the studio and nausea pooled in the pit of her stomach as she waited impatiently for Fiona Bruce’s face to disappear.

“While no children were hurt-” Ben said and Julia let out the breath stuck inside her throat as her rigid stance relaxed only slightly. “There were several police casualties and we don’t fully know the extent of the situation and I imagine more news will come.” 

The report blended away before she switched the television off, her eyes searching the exterior of the glass office for her blue-eyed boy, but he was still nowhere. Surely his meeting couldn’t have gone on that long? He would have to know about his son’s school and for a bizarre moment, she couldn’t bear him hearing it from anyone else but her. Breath coming in short, shallow pants, she swallowed hard and pulled out her phone. Dialling his number would be too risky and so she settled for a simple text, one that would convey no emotion to anyone but him, should anyone intercept it but when he hadn’t responded after ten minutes, she leaned forward onto her elbows and clasped her hands in front of her mouth. 

Where was he? He wasn’t exactly always reliable in his private life, but he certainly was professional enough to be where he was supposed to be… and yet… She chewed her lip and watched her phone screen for any reply. The second she took her eyes off it, the phone vibrated with life but the hot wave of emotion that shot through her spine dissipated when she saw it wasn’t him.

-x-

The lift felt like a coffin, more so than ever, when Kim stepped in after her, always her shadow that she couldn’t shake. Somehow Julia never seemed to mind so much when it was David following her around... but now, her head ached and the day hadn’t reached the midway point. Being summoned to Number Ten didn’t exactly do much to dampen her growing mood.

The lift passed the fourth floor and she opened her mouth, closed it again, before she cleared her throat.

“Wasn’t Sergeant Budd supposed to relieve you?” she said calmer than she felt. Kim avoided her glance, looked down at her shoes without breaking professional protocol.

“I had assumed you’d heard, ma’am,” she finally said, and ice spiked her spine.

“Heard what?” she said in what she hoped was stronger than she felt.

“That he had gone to the school to pick up his son, ma’am.”

Kim was calm and composed as she said those words, thinking nothing more of it, Julia assumed and she wished her peace of mind would rub off onto her. She gave a curt nod and stepped out into the cold December air with a flurry of snow fluttering around them. Having no desire to be out in this weather for longer than was absolutely necessary, especially in her Burberry coat, Julia quickened her pace to the car that was already waiting for her, her eyes vehemently trained forward, forcing an almost impassive indifference on her face. 

As they made their way through the hectic pre-Christmas traffic to Downing Street at long last, Julia took yet another peek at her phone, hoping, wishing for a reply to her text, a missed call or any sign from David for that matter. But apart from the obvious missed calls from Roger, that automatically went straight to voicemail, as she simply did not have the time to quarrel with her pompous and absolutely idiotic ex-husband on the phone. 

Try as she might, dread crept over her like an icy chill, threatening to numb her brain altogether with only one thought occupying it: What if something happened to David? What if he is one of the three casualties? And there was nothing she could do, nobody should ask without exposing their secret. For a moment, she felt completely lost in space, like an astronaut with no way to go back to her space station, who doesn’t know where it’s going and what she had to do. 

“Two on five…,” Julia vaguely heard Kim talk into her radio, not giving much care, too preoccupied with fighting an anxiety attack. “Oh God, have the families been informed yet? Do we know for certain it’s him?”

Julia’s head whipped up, having momentarily thrown all caution to the wind. 

“Okay, ten-four, I’ll inform the necessaries,” Kim murmured into her earpiece as Julia waited, counting down the seconds until Kim would tell her what she wanted to know. But no word came from the stoic, rigid back police officer until impatience grew too strong within her.

She opened her mouth, the demand for information on her tongue when Kim turned her head to watch her over her shoulder.

“I think you should know ma’am, Sergeant Budd was caught up in the attack this morning ... “ the rest of her words faded away as Julia’s mind raced with possibilities, each catastrophic event in her head worse than the last. “Ma’am?” 

She came to, and looked at the woman in charge of keeping her safe, staring back at her with thinly veiled curiosity. Julia shook her head gently sharply side to side, ignoring Kim’s glance. 

“Yes, yes I just - do they know how many are injured?” She said, an eyebrow raised to suggest her interest was merely professional. 

“Not sure yet, ma’am. Initial reports seem to be that three officers are dead and several injured,” Kim said and Julia would have to be heartless or obtuse not to recognise the pain for her fallen comrades, in her voice. 

“God,” she whispered, acutely aware that this was about more than just David Budd. People had died. Her pulse stuttered in her veins. HE could be one of them…No. She cleared her throat, keeping her voice as level as she could when she said, “my condolences to their families.”

Kim only gave a simple nod in response as she broached her next question, trying out the words in her mouth, sloping them over her tongue, tasting them before she committed to it. 

“And Dav-Sergeant Budd?” She forced out, her cool facade doing nothing to betray the fractious anxiety inside her.

“He was taken to the hospital, ma’am,” Kim only said and Julia nodded to herself. Hospital meant he had to be okay. But what if-

The came to a halt and Julia tried to prepare herself for the avalanche of questions and shouts that would undoubtedly follow, the second she showed her face out on the street. Kim stepped out first and let her out only a few seconds later. As she followed the stern woman towards the black door with the golden number 10. she found herself wishing he would be there, if only so she could know he was fine. Of course, he WAS fine, he just … wasn’t here to show her he was fine. Instead, Tom stood by the door and she tried to push all thoughts of that Scottish distraction from her mind because to think anything other than he was okay, was unfathomable.

-x-

All her life, Julia had been the perfect professional. First as a criminal barrister and then as a politician. She had never had problems separating her emotions and thoughts from her job, prevent them from intermingling and merging into one another. Yet now, as the door opened for her, she felt her cool, composed veneer crack just a little bit. 

She felt distracted, unsafe, almost like a different Julia. One she didn’t know. One that let her emotions take control over her actions and her entire thought process. It was amazing for Julia how everyone would just go on about their business as if nothing happened. 

Julia fought to keep her composure upright, bringing in years of professional training, so she worked automatically - almost like a robot that knew the steps and was programmed to work a certain way. It worked surprisingly well for the time of their briefing. People were talking, bantering, arguing almost, she piped up every once in a while, yet all the while her mind was occupied. It was almost as if she was in two places at once. Still, she thought she did a fairly good job at appearing normal, like the Julia everyone knew or thought they knew. That was until she heard a condescending voice coming from the side as she stood again, making her way out again.

“What’s gotten into you today? Cat got your tongue or are you simply missing your Scottish monkey?”

“I don’t see how this is any of your business,” Julia replied curtly, fixing him with one icy look before she turned back on her task at hand, putting her notes back into her briefcase. 

“Sorry to disappoint you, but when the Home Secretary is dreaming away a meeting, missing key points the whole thing, then it is my business.”

Julia sighed exasperatedly, took the briefcase off the table and looked back up at him at last. She tried her best job to look as unnerved as possible, though the idea that Roger, of all people, had been able to see through her so easily unsettled her - to say the least.

“If there is a point to this conversation, feel free to come to it. I have other things to do than stand around.” 

As she fixed him with a pointed look, she saw a smirk dance around his lips.

“So, your absent-mindedness isn’t perhaps because of the fact that your precious PPO has been admitted to hospital.”

For a moment all Julia could do was stare at him. It took her a moment to compose herself once more, not feel as if struck by lightning. But as the smirk on his face grew wider, her irateness replaced any irritation. 

“You should know by now, I know everything that goes around Julia,” he said, almost mockingly. 

Her heart pounded adrenaline prickling at the base of her neck, creeping up over her head. He knew. Did he? He looked like he knew… something. But then he could be doing what he usually did, fishing for information; waiting for her to slip up and provide the rope to hang herself. She wouldn’t give him the satisfaction. 

“Whatever you’re trying to insinuate, do it on your own time, not mine,” she said, putting an end to whatever game he was going to try and play. At least temporarily anyway. 

She moved around him, only letting her shoulders relax once she had breezed past him and she could see Kim at the end of the corridor; her escape in sight. 

“Ma’am,” Kim said as she approached and they stepped into the bitter cold air of London. Oh what she wouldn’t give for the Costa Del Sol, Julia thought as she pulled her jacket tighter around her. The biting wind didn’t seem to bother her PPO and not for the first time she wondered if her shivering was a byproduct of something else. 

“Any word on Sergeant Budd?” she asked casually as Kim opened the car door and she slid in, elegant as always. Kim followed suit, clambering into the front and Julia stared at her blonde bun hard enough to turn lava into stone.

“No ma’am, the last update I had was that his family had been informed,” came the rather stoic reply and Julia nodded her head slowly, digesting the information, letting it sit in her stomach like a lead weight. “He should be fine, and back to work soon, I imagine, ma’am.”

Work. Right. That’s exactly what she should be thinking about; the inconvenience of having her best protection officer away from duty. But she couldn’t stop the way her pulse spiked each time she thought of him, scarred skin mottled with a fresh batch of bruises and broken bones, his delicately rugged face marred with blood and burns. She almost couldn’t stand it as she opened the window enough to let the cool air sweep over her face, ruffling the loose curls that framed her face. He had run his hand through those curls, many times, when looking down at her, settled nicely between her legs and a coy smile on his face as he took in her post-orgasmic sheen. 

Fuck.

-x-

It wasn’t until the car moved off route towards Saint George’s, that Julia felt the burning anxiety sloshing around her stomach, creeping up her gullet like it was on fire. Nausea was not something she would ever get used to; she disliked the way it knocked her off her feet, taking her by surprise and cutting her down. She certainly didn’t welcome it now as she avoided the questioning glances from the front of the car.

“Ma’am, I think it would be best if we went back-” 

“I need to-” Julia sniped before stopped, drew air in and closed her eyes. When she opened them, she was calm and collected. “It’s my duty, as the home secretary, to see the victims.” 

Especially since I knew about it… she thought, suddenly finding the grey murky London skyline, far more interesting than the back of her PPO’s blonde head.

Despite the lie, she was telling herself, Julia remained silent for the short trip to the hospital, heart hammering in her throat when the car slowed to a halt. 

“This is highly irregular, ma’am and I can’t let you go in unprotected ” Kim said, twisting in her seat to look at her, so unlike the way David would have met her glance in the rearview mirror; so sexy and illicit. 

Julia gave a curt nod, nothing else seemed to remain to be done. It was bad enough having to go in, being ogled at by the whole staff, wondering what the Home Secretary was doing at their hospital. If it was only possible to go in unbeknownst to everyone present and sneak into David’s room.

She felt every pair of eyes stare at her, gawp at her as she strode into the hospital, Kim ahead of her, getting information on David and the other injured policemen’s whereabouts. With as much professionalism as she could muster, Julia hung back.

“This way, ma’am. The injured are on the third floor.” 

With that Kim goose-stepped to the elevators, Julia in tow, raking her hand through her hair as she kept her eyes trained on her PPO.

Her heart started drumming in her chest, threatening to jump out of her ribcage. The very idea of seeing him, not knowing what state she’d find him in, how badly he was hurt. All the time she would have to feign ignorance, a lack of emotion.

The lift opened on the third floor and as Julia stepped out, she wondered if Kim would drag her around a circuit of the injured before they’d get to the one she really cared about. That was harsh, even for her; she should care for those injured and yet she couldn’t quite bring herself to quash the desperate need to see David. 

“He’s through there ma’am,” Kim’s voice cut through her reverie as they came to a stop outside a blank door. 

Julia unwittingly took small steps towards it, hand rising to reach for the handle before she looked back, waiting for Kim to choose to precede her, but she remained steadfast, fixed firmly on the other side of the corridor. 

The room was sterile, much how she expected hospital rooms to be. The beeps of various machines hit her first before she rounded the corner to see David lying in the bed. Her breath caught, eyes roaming over the dried blood on his head, wires attached to his arm intravenously and otherwise. Then she saw the woman fussing with a jug of water.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t realise… If you need to do tests, I can come back later-” Julia said, her hands clasped in front of her, thumb gently stroking comforting circles on her inner wrist. 

The woman, pretty and blonde… and young, looked up, her NHS badge bouncing around as she moved. She gave a cautious smile.

“Oh, I’m not the nurse… I mean… I am A nurse, but I’m not his… I’m Dave’s wife,” the woman said and Julia’s breath evaded her. Rarely speechless, she couldn’t form a coherent word other than ‘oh’ in response. “I’m Vicky.”

Ahh yes, he had mentioned her before; Vick… love… Julia was sure her smile wobbled as it curled over her lips but a beat passed and she was back to cool and collected.

“I didn’t realise …” she trailed off, acting the casual bystander. Vicky laughed as she replaced the jug. 

“Ohhhh right - no … we’re separated. I just happened to be his next of kin still,” she said and Julia wondered why that sparked unease in her. Vicky watched her for a minute before she narrowed her eyes. “You’re Dave’s boss, right? Erm the … home secretary yeah?” 

That stung for reasons she’d never admit, but Julia smiled all the same.

“Well he works for the police service, I’m just the person he’s assigned to protect,” she forced, moving towards the bed. “How is he? No one has told me much…and your children!”

“The kids are fine, thank you. Dave… well, he’s been through worse. He should be fine in a few days,” Vicky said pointedly and Julia couldn’t avoid the feeling of pointed fingers.

She turned away when Vicky smoothed a hand over his forehead brushing his curls back, and it suddenly felt like she was intruding. 

“I’ll come back later,” she said.

“No, really I have to get back to work, it was nice to meet you, Ms Montague.”

“Yes, you too, Mrs Budd,” she held out her hand in an oddly formal gesture but if Vicky Budd thought it odd, she didn’t show it when she shook the outstretched hand and left principal and PPO alone in the room.

Julia sighed as she loomed over him, looking at each graze on his face, each little cut where god knows what had shredded him and she stretched her arm out, her fingers brushing against his skin, thumb gliding over his cheek lightly.

She was alone for the first time since the news had been bestowed on her and she sank into the chair beneath the heavy burden of everything, her eyes watering as she listened to the steady thrum of the machines pumping vital fluids into his veins. He looked so helpless, so damaged in ways she couldn’t even comprehend and yet …

She reached over to touch his hand; it was colder than she remembered. Julia was not one for breakdowns, not since the early years of her marriage when she realised Roger would never be faithful to her, but she let the tears slip down her ivory cheeks without impedance, bowing her head to her lap. 

“Julia?” 

All the exhaustion, the anxiety and the fear of losing him had culminated and it all threatened to crash down on her like a monstrous wave. The tears that had found their way down her cheek, had only been the tip of the massive iceberg. lying underneath. So, when she heard David’s voice hoarse and still tired with sleep, mumble her name barely above a whisper, it tipped the scale for Julia. 

Whatever stubborn determination and strength she may have had before, to appear like the collected politician she usually way, was now utterly lost. A sob of relief burst from Julia’s chest as she clung her hand to his. 

“Oh, my God,” she merely she almost blubbered, fighting a losing battle against her emotions, “don’t ever do this to me again.”

“Don’t worry, I’m Scottish. it needs heavier artillery, to knock me down,” David attempted a joke to lighten up her mood and gave her one of his rare warm smiles, inexpressibly grateful to see her here. It had been the last thing he had expected, knowing what it might possibly look like to outsiders, having the oh-so-guarded Home Secretary visit her PPO in hospital after a terrorist attack. Once again she had managed to surprise him. 

For a long moment, neither spoke but merely intertwined their fingers and looked at each other. No words were needed. Julia’s tears, albeit still rolling down her cheeks, were slowly but surely ebbing away as David tentatively cupped her cheek with this still free hand brushing away another stubborn tear that made its way downwards.

“When I heard the news this morning, all I could think of was you, worry if you were fine or if I had … lost you…,” she finished and looked up into his crystal-blue eyes again, fighting back more tears. The idea of having lost David was too much for Julia to take in or even comprehend. She brushed a strand of his unkempt curls from his forehead and raked her fingers briefly through his hair. 

At that moment realisation almost knocked her sideways and the meaning of the words she had mumbled merely moments before dawned on her at last. It could have been so much worse. She really could have lost him. Lost the one man who had snuck his way into her heart in record time. The prospect of a future without him as a grim and dark one. One she was not sure, she had been ready to face. It was nearly a miracle that he was lying there, bruised and battered but alive. 

An incredible wave of gratitude and warmth surged through her body. She did not think that anybody would come crashing into the room, with having Kim posted outside and kept on holding onto his hand. The need to touch him, feel him somehow was too simply too great. 

Silence laid over them like a soothing blanket. Julia had her eyes locked onto their hands. When neither spoke for what felt like an eternity, she was almost certain he had fallen asleep again. 

"What happens now," David mumbled, his voice finally a little stronger, his eyes flickering towards the door, jerking Julia out of her reverie.

Julia looked at their intertwined fingers. The skin of her cheeks where her tears had dried, now like sandpaper. She was well aware of the ramifications this would have, but somehow it felt insignificant compared to the thought of having to spend a future without him. 

"We'll weather the storm, together, side by side. There is no use pretending they haven't at least got an inkling that this," she flicked her finger between them, "... might be more than a professional relationship... that you are more to me than my PPO."

Suddenly she felt uncertain. She hadn't even taken his side into the equation. Perhaps this was just an affair to him after all.

A gentle squeeze from his fingers, let her look upwards at him, not quite sure if she should look into his eyes, knowing full well, they would betray her. But she was drawn to his eyes like a magnet, there was no way she could ever resist them. It was quite ridiculous really. 

“I want to be right beside you… besides, I made it through war once, I will manage again and with you by my side…”

He trailed off, squeezing her fingers once again. Words failed him, as per usual. Julia did not need the rest of his sentence to understand his intention. She gave him the indication of a smile, giving her best attempt to reassure him and held on tight to his hand.


End file.
